


Peanut Butter With Extra Nut

by Castiel_in_Drag



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Bad Dirty Talk, Bottom Eren Yeager, Crack, Daddy Kink, Dirty Talk, I Don't Even Know, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Inappropriate Humor, Kink Meme, M/M, Odd Descriptions of Genitalia, Omega Eren Yeager, Plot Twists, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Ridiculous, Sexual Humor, Student Eren Yeager, Student Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Top Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Tutoring, What Have I Done, crack smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-22
Updated: 2017-12-22
Packaged: 2019-02-18 07:16:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13095126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Castiel_in_Drag/pseuds/Castiel_in_Drag
Summary: Horny Levi is desperate for the Jaeger booty and will do anything to service his Ere-bear, including changing Eren’s grades so he can be his personal tutor.  **Crack Smut**





	Peanut Butter With Extra Nut

**Author's Note:**

> The following is the unholy combination of crack and smut. Please read with caution. Be prepared for every description you didn’t think could be used to describe genitalia and terrible (purposeful) spelling mistakes.

Levi was so super excited. He totally scored an invite to the cutest kawaii babe-meister, Eren Jaeger’s house. All it took was repeatedly and purposefully sneaking into Mr Smith’s office every day and changing Eren's 70 to 80 percent grade to 30 or 40 percent. He also changed his to 100 percent so Shittybrows would suggest him as the bestest tutor for Eren.

 

Eventually Eren had been forced to ask for his help and if Levi would come to his house to tutor him. Levi had almost shrieked. Hell yeah he was totally gonna get some of dat bounty-ful jaegermiester delicious booty. He couldn't wait to slither his disco stick in Eren's slip and slide cavern.

 

So here, he was chillin' and teachin' Eren in his bedroom. He decided that his style of teaching would be like that one scene from that movie Ghost with that pussyslayer Patrice Swayez so Eren was sitting in his lap as Levi's hand guided Eren's writing hand. Eren kept bouncing his leg cause he needed to tinkle but Levi wouldn't let him. Levi meanwhile was fighting to control his rooster that was rising in his super skinny ripped knee ultra black skinny jeans that were always super comfortable and form fitting.

 

"Leeeevvviii," moaned Eren huskily, writhing in Levi’s arms. "My tummy hurts!"

 

Levi squeezed Eren closer. "What is it Eren? Are you sick? Should I call the doctor? Do you feel light headed? Would you like me to-"

 

"Hahaha," Eren giggled. "No I'm horngry. I want my peanut butter with extra nut! It in my bag."

 

Levi smirked. His Eren was so kawaii.  He reached into Eren's bag and pulled out an unopened jar. He used his super manly muscle to wrench the lid of and took out his hefty sausage from his pants.  He gave his Little Levi a few tugs then slid himself into the opened jar and began bucking his hips.

 

"Gasp, Levi!" gasped Eren as he was bounced up and down with Levi's thrusts. "W-what are y-y-you d-doing with my p-p-peanut b-butter with e-e-extra nut! You're m-making me h-h-hangry now!"

 

Levi crammed his gob-smacker further into the peanut butter.  "You said you wanted peanut butter with extra nut, Eren. So I'm going to put some extra nut in it for you."

 

"Gasp Levi!" gasped Eren. "M-my dad-d-ddy s-says that's n-n-naughty to jab y-your man st-t-tick into anything!"

 

"Tch," tched Levi. He fucked his pussy-jabber faster into the squelching jar. "Then I'll be your daddy now, Ere-bear. I'll take super good care of you as long as you make a super sexy dance just for me every day and help me clean my house. And as your daddy I say that your peanut butter should always have my nut in it."

 

"Oooooh daddy Levi, will you really? I promise I can make super sexy dances just for you." Eren whimpered.

 

Levi smirked. He couldn't wait to see his Eren writhe and jiggle his pert and succulent ass cheeks sexily just for him.  Just the thought had his cumsacks quiver with his secret sauce and he yearned for Eren's torted caverns.  His hips bucked wildly as his cum-crammer began spurting his white sticky ambrosia. He peeled the jar off himself and thrust it towards his booty-ful prize. 

 

He presented it to Eren who gasped.  He slid off Levi's lap and began devouring the peanut butter with extra nut that slowly slid down Levi's Little Levi. Levi gaped then moaned lowly.

 

“E-Eren, what are you doing?” Levi exclaimed, his limbs trembling.

 

Eren pulled off Levi’s meaty sausage with an audible ‘pop’.  He gazed at Levi with those glistening turquoise stone eyes and panted softly, his breath puffing lightly against Levi’s moistened rod.  Levi watched helplessly as Eren’s gem eyes grew wet and tears began to stream delicately down his cheeks. 

 

“L-Levi, I’m secretly an omega and hearing you promise to be my daddy forever triggered my heat and now I’m super needy and horny for your thick and sticky cream.  Can I please have it, Daddy Levi?”

 

Levi swallowed hard, his mouth dry.  He was vaguely aware of him nodding his head.  Eren took that as permission and leapt forward to lick and suck Levi's baby-spurter eagerly.  Meanwhile Levi was caught in his thots.  Eren, an omega.  He had hoped.  He had prayed.  But to hear it?  His brat could make more brats.  Brats that would look like him and his love.  Levi knew immediately what he had to do.  He wrenched Eren’s mouth off his little man and looked him dead in the eye. 

 

“Ereeen, will you-,” Levi swallowed and took a moment to harden his nerves.  “Will you… be my personal cum-dump?”

 

Eren exclaimed.  “Exclaim, Levi.  Yes, Levi, of course!  This is every omega’s dream.”

 

Levi growled.  “Then that’s enough teasing.  Hop onto my hot rod and I’ll plant my sweet and creamy salve into your hot and needy caverns.”

 

Eren moaned lowly and stood on shaking legs to straddle Levi and slide his moist channel over Levi’s erect solider. 

 

“Levi!”

 

“Eren!”

 

They both gasped as Eren began bouncing wildly and Levi began thrusting his loins upwards.  Levi thought about how precious Eren would look round with his child and he soon found himself spurting his hot nectar into Eren’s sticky beehive. 

 

Eren moaned and leaned back.  He put a hand on his stomach and giggled.  “I can feel you inside me Levi.  You exquisite seed warming me from the inside out.  I can’t wait to see if I can pregnert from just this.”

 

“Of course you will be with brat, brat.  I’m super manly and strong so my swimmers are too, so there.” Levi’s snorted haughtily. 

 

Eren smiled brightly before a frown crept onto his perfect and wonderful face.  “Well then, Levi, how will you support me and this baby?”

 

“Eren, there’s something I haven’t told you.  I’m secretly the unruly and rogue-ish heir to a huge Mafioso gang that spans that world.  My mother disappeared when I was young and I stopped feeling because my heart and soul were filled with unbearable anguish and angsty pain but I couldn’t claim my inheritance until I learned how to feel again.   Now that I know you though, I know what love is, so now I can claim my fortune and become the tough underworld mafia boss I was always meant to be and you can be my Queen that I shower in adoration and gifts.”

 

Eren surged forward and sealed their courtship with a wet kiss.  Levi cupped Eren’s belly and thanked his lucky stars for peanut butter with extra nut. 

 

And they lived gayly ever after.

 

“Oh Levi!”

 

“Oh Eren!”

 

**Author's Note:**

> 50% of my time writing this was trying to think of ways to describe Levi’s dick without calling it what it is. Hope this drew even a single laugh out of anyone who braved this to the end.


End file.
